MSPeconomist

Some airlines forbid nonrevs from even asking revenue passengers to swap seats.

dayone

Whenever I border on being bothered by the elderly, I think of my parents. Suddenly, I'm not bothered anymore. YMMV.

halamadrid

That's an angle I hadn't thought about, but thanks for pointing that out. I guess I was just thinking from the perspective of when I fly alone where I always wait until the door is about to close before boarding. If the person has been waiting in the seat I'm about to switch to, that seat is gonna be burning up already with the thin padding already squeezed down to the inner plastic ...I'd much rather show up to a fresh identical seat across the aisle (btw this happens to me some times and as long as the seat is identical aisle for aisle I don't really care if they've switched already).

MSPeconomist

I've learned to check whether a seat poacher has messed up my pillow and blanket. If their seat is nearby, I grab these items from their seat as they're slowly gathering their stuff for the forced move. There's no reason I should be stuck with the pillow and blanked on which they already sat and maybe also spilled their PDB. <learned from experience>

halamadrid

Smart move@:-) ...again, I would much rather that person not have been in the seat I'll be on for that flight...just don't like the feeling. I know it's irrational, but I like to arrive at a seat that has had a good cooling off period and hasn't been messed with.

evergrn

Similar story. Last month I'd just boarded and settled into my aisle seat on a 10hr TPAC flight, when the guy asked me if we could swap seats so he could sit next to his wife. He just said his seat was 2 rows behind and I swear he pointed at the aisle seat. So I said yes and I go sit there. Then a lady came and said that was her seat. I went back to the guy and his BP showed middle seat. Told him no can do, and he goes "are you serious?" I'm thinking ...! I didn't budge and we un-traded our seats. And then there's this person on the aisle seat right nearby giving me the looks as if I'd done something terrible. I didn't do anything wrong, yet I felt like an ... for the next hour or so regardless.

NYCtraveler

I was in Business class on a JFK-LAX flight. It was oversold and delayed and basically a hot mess at boarding. I had a great seat in row 5 mid section of 2x2x2. A guy came up to me and wanted to sit next to his wife, anniversary etc. He had as seat in the last row on the window Aisle and I would still be on the aisle....Fine. I changed moved baggage etc.

I was hungry and when the meal cart came around they only thing they had was stinky Salmon......I declined and said I would take whatever my original seat had ordered, which was chicken breast, and went to speak to him.....his reply was "Dude, you gave me this seat and the meal is mine, you have no rights to it"....And I thought to myself......This is the last time I will EVER give up my seat. And after that....500+ flights later.....i never have.

I have been asked no less than 50 times since then....and politely refuse every time. I am not in the matchmaking business. People live with their wives and husbands....6 hours apart is no hardship. Someone once tried to tell me that his wife cannot fly without him next to her or else she has a nervous breakdown,.....I told him she should see a doctor......She had no problems. IF someone wants to sit next to their significant other Too Bad....Then they should buy the seat and not inconvenience those of us who are on flights every day. Stop this cheap selfish stuff. When I am flying with my partner.....We PAY the full fare or discounted F fare and choose our seats far before. And once again...NEVER change.

Safe travels to all! NYC

Jimgotkp

I remember flying LAS-EWR on the 757s w/ lie-flat seats for an overnight flight. I purposely chose bulkhead so I can get a bigger foot space. PAX in 1A wanted me to switch with her husband in the 3rd row (window) seat. I said no since I booked this seat far in advance. She then complained to the FA and the FA and her started glaring at me and saying how people with free upgrades shouldn't care about their seats. This made me quite uncomfortable so I decided to switch seats in the end. Even though it wasn't a free upgrade as I used a RPU that was gifted to me at that time, I was upset that the FA was on her side. I'm guessing the PAX in 1A booked a F seat at the time of booking while hoping that the husband clears his upgrade at the upgrade window. If they booked at the same time, they could've chose other seats that were next to each other. *sigh*

Nowadays I say no if people ask me unless it's a fair swap. No preferences towards families either.

respawn

I'll start by saying that with rare exceptions, my fiance and I book tickets together at the same time, so this has yet to happen to me. However, for us it's usually a matter of who has what in each bag. She may have something I need or vice versa.

The only time that we booked separately was for Thanksgiving 2014. I was originally flying solo back home for Thanksgiving. Then I broke my elbow and my wrist and she decided to come with me sicne I could barely manage to get dressed on my own. I called DL, booked her flight, rebooked my flight to match hers, and got us matching seat assignments, paid EC for her. But since they weren't the same booking in the system, we weren't linked. So when I got the FC upgrade, and another pax was assigned to the aisle seat next to her, it turned into a bit of a mess. I had to get the GA to shuffle me back to my original seat, move the other pax again, all while complaining about the guy who refused an FC upgrade. (Who had both a sling and a cast...)

The "worst" part about that experience is that we took off with a half full FC cabin. If we'd been on the same booking, she would have been able to piggyback on my status and we'd both be in FC.

Mac1K

SEAT KARMA

If you travel enough, you get asked to move. And like many have said, if you're polite and don't poach the seat beforehand, many (Including me) will trade. There is an old idiom, "You catch more flies with honey than with vinegar." It is certainly true when dealing with trades such as this.

My full circle Karma story:

I was in coach on a 3+ hour flight and comfortably settled in my aisle seat (D) when a mother and baby sat in the center seat. Her husband had been assigned to the middle seat of the row behind and she asked if I would kindly trade. As a parent and as a FF sitting I know that sitting next to a baby is challenging to say the least so I obliged and took the middle seat for which the mother AND the father were very grateful and thanked me profusely. That alone made me feel good about the trade.

I was the only person in the row at the time so I waited to see if I was going to be wedged between two football players or I would have a modicum of personal space. A couple soon approached and amazingly asked if I would change to the aisle seat so that they could sit together as she preferred the window. You know my answer, I'm sure.

I made two couples happy that day and in the end, suffered nothing.

SEAT KARMA

LucyGoose

Don't feel bad. The guy who tried to con you into a middle seat is the &%$! in this situation.

I purchase my seats in advance for a reason....the cheapskates never do and just show up and try one on.

donaldsc

NEVER. I pick my seats for a reason. If you were not proactive - tough on you.

DON

capedr

I fly with my wife and two kids;16 and 18.

Many moons ago we flew in a row but as time has gone on we find that we all like the window seat so I try to book 4 window seats. It gives us our own space and the ability to strike up conversations with people outside of our foursome.

And I have ingrained in my children to NEVER change seats without my permission. There have been rare exceptions and NEVER for the middle seat.

Points Scrounger

I have encountered a seat poacher once (I forget the route as it was years ago).

Arrived to find a couple seated in my F seat and other one. They had obviously prepared for my arrival as before I could open my mouth to object the wife declared, "We were supposed to be together, but 'it got messed up' (or similar)." Her tone was quite defiant, communicating clearly, "I'm not making any effort at all to move unless you create a scene with the crew." I suppose in hindsight I should've done that, but wasn't up to being seated by her husband for a couple of hours to make my point.

jAAck

Count me in the group that reserves a particular seat whenever possible - and unlike most I'm a fan of the bulkhead - so I'm not really happy to be asked to move elsewhere. Depending on the circumstances and if asked nicely, I will. And full disclosure, I've asked a few times myself when circumstances couldn't be avoided (amazing how an equipment swap can put one of you in the front row and the other in the back row).

But I also really don't like someone assuming I'll switch, and especially taking my seat before asking. To Points Scrounger, in that situation I might have switched too but I'd have definitely pointed out to the woman that the polite thing to do is always to ask, not assume, and never demand.