Agree with all of above, which is to say I would be frustrated, too; but, as others have said, no way to know what would have happened. For PHL-SFO/LAX/PHX I grab an exit row seat and count myself lucky if an upgrade comes through.
Also, when I can (maybe OP couldn't), I double-check on-line to make sure various PNR splitting, upgrades, seat moves, and other over-the-phone voodoo actually went through. Mostly it does but as OP can attest sometimes it doesn't.