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Worst Passenger of the Week: B-List Celebrities Gone Wild

Every Friday, FlyerTalk looks back at the week’s most charming individuals. While there are always plenty of contenders for our Worst Passenger of the Week award, only one lucky flyer can take home the glory. Here are this week’s winners.

Third Place – “A Literal Piece of S**T”

Discovering feces in a plastic-wrapped blanket handed to her by a flight attendant certainly doesn’t qualify comedian Nicole Byer as a nominee for Worst Passenger of the Week. In fact, Byer’s reaction to finding the unwelcome surprise hidden in her Delta Airlines provided amenity seems perfectly reasonable.

Of course, it would be difficult to not overreact to finding poop in one’s airline blanket, but the television personality’s tweet sounds about right. “I guess now I’ll be cold on all my flights because I can never use a blanket again BC A LITERAL PIECE OF S*** WAS IN MY LAST BLANKET,” Byer wrote. The comedian even added a photograph of the offending bowel movement with the brief explanation, “I would have taken a better picture of the crusty s***. But it was crusty s*** and I didn’t care to get close to it again.”

The customer service agents, likewise, cannot be blamed for approaching Byer’s claim with a degree of skepticism. The icky tale of a turd-covered inflight blanket is, after all, the very definition of incredible. It appears the airline eventually attempted to compensate the reality show host for her uncomfortable experience. Byer says she was offered a full refund for her crappy flight along with an additional 50,000 SkyMiles.

While the employee who re-wrapped a seriously soiled blanket for reuse isn’t exactly a hero, the real villain in this case is the unknown passenger on a previous flight who apparently pooped in a blanket and then left the unwelcome surprise for the next traveler to enjoy.

The Runner-up “Rich the Kid” Needs to Grow-up

It wasn’t just his need to allegedly play loud music as his Delta Airlines flight taxied to the gate after landing at Los Angeles International Airport (LAX) that caused problems for rapper Rich the Kid. Based on the hip-hop artist’s previous discography, it doesn’t seem likely his music selection was chosen for the enjoyment of the majority of his fellow travelers in mind, but the incident didn’t require a law enforcement response until a flight attendant asked the performer to either turn down the volume or use headphones to enjoy his musical interlude upon landing.

Dimitri Leslie Roger (aka Rich the Kid) reportedly declined to follow the crew member’s polite request. Still, with the plane nearly at the gate, it seems unlikely that the flight attendant was eager to make an even bigger issue out of Roger’s defiant and boorish, but ultimately harmless behavior.

The final straw might have been when Rich the Kid is said to have rudely called the flight attendant “rusty” for daring to enforce the rules. No matter when the recording artist crossed the line, police were waiting on the jetway when he disembarked the flight.

A video of the rapper’s exchange with officers showed an ever-so-subtle change in attitude. While he had the good sense to offer a modicum of respect for law enforcement, patiently listening to a brief lecture about federal rules regarding disruptive passengers, before police allowed the musician to continue on his way, he lamented that the real problem was that a “rusty-assed bitch called the police on me for playing music!”

The Winner – Leave FRA Alone!

Former Real Housewives of Atlanta star Kim Zolciak-Biermann really, really doesn’t like Frankfurt Airport (FRA). The reality television star took to Twitter to complain that the tools of her trade were mishandled at a security checkpoint. The jetsetting housewife grumbled to her followers that screeners were “throwing my wigs around & shit” and “squeezing all my Nutri-grain bars.”

Zolciak-Biermann’s issues began when a test indicated possible traces of explosive chemicals on her person. Although the minor celebrity was found not to be carrying explosives, she was less than pleased with the additional screening measures that followed the false positive test result.

Zolciak-Biermann’s daughter, who was also on the trip, took an even more hostile position regarding her experience at Germany’s busiest airport. “Germany airport every single person who works here can go f**k themselves,” Brielle Biermann posted in solidarity with her mom. “Don’t ever f***ing come to Germany,” she later added to her trip report. “I hate this place.”

The pair’s biggest gripe seems to be that security officials had the gall to blame the intense pre-flight inspection procedures on the US government. While the Bravo star took this as an affront to her patriotism, the screeners were absolutely correct in stating that passengers on flights headed to the US are indeed subject to much more aggressive security measures than passengers headed to most other destinations.

Biermann later tweeted that after a long ordeal, she was finally on her way to Hartsfield–Jackson Atlanta International Airport (ATL), an airport with charms of its own. However, for those passengers who can live with gruff security screeners, tousled wigs and an occasional squeezed Nutri-grain bar, it’s worth noting that in addition to world-class shopping, FRA has both a casino and a Hooters on site making it the best airport in the world.

[Photo: Facebook/@KimZolciakOfficial]

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6 Comments
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RUAMKZ April 27, 2017

Who the hell is Nicole Byer? At least I (kinda) know who Kim Zolciak is.

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malbarda March 30, 2017

No Hooters, but there still is a sex shop in T1: https://foursquare.com/v/beate-uhse/4be3d64af07b0f4772faf843 This makes FRA the only airport in the world with a sex shop. At least as far as I am aware...

T
ThatsAviation March 30, 2017

The Casino might still be at FRA, but Hooters closed 4-5 years years ago. No great loss.

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bkcarolina March 30, 2017

No, the real problem with the turd in the blanket is that the blankets are not washed between passengers, just refolded and repackaged. Disgusting thing you never anticipate!

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Faker1 March 30, 2017

No Hooters any more. Hooters found out there was an unlicensed restaurant using their concept. That was the end.